Killer Queen Version 2.0

After killing brain cells yesterday doing so much thinking/writing about Earth Day I decided to kill off brain cells the way the rest of America does and talk about something that has captivated America every year from January to June for the last 8 years.  That’s right; I am talking about American Idol.  Now, when AI started way back in 2001 I was down for watching it.  The beginning of every season does a great job of showing everything that is wrong in America.  What I mean is it gives you a snapshot of what happens when every day of a kid’s life they are told by their parents, teachers, coaches, friends, relatives, and internet chat rooms that they are really good at something when in all actuality they not only suck at it, but should have tried something else a long time ago.  It shows what the consequences are from giving the team that comes in last place a trophy, and a note telling them that since they tried their hardest, they are winners too.

 

If I have lost you here let me explain myself.  Every year at the beginning of A.I., you will inevitably have a great many of contestants on the show get up in front of the judges with the confidence that because their Parents and Grandparents told them how wonderful they are at singing while in the shower they could be the next American Idol.  But after 15 seconds of them destroying Stevie Wonder or Celine Dion every single man, woman, and child in America (not to mention the judges sitting there having to listen first hand to the hot mess.) knows that they just witnessed crappiness at its finest.  At that same moment we witness an epic fail, the person who sang the song truly believes they just blew away Simon Cowell and Co.  It isn’t until Randy says dog in a disparaging tone 5-6 times, Paula gets that look on her face like the last swig of gin out of the Coca-cola cup in from of her had gone bad, and Simon perks up knowing he is about to destroy someone for the first time in their life that said person has any idea they just sucked it up.  Of course this is followed by tears, and hug from Mom and Grandma wearing identical tweedy bird shirts who are telling their little shooting star how the judges were so unfair to them, and how next year when they audition again the judges will see how they made a mistake. 

 

This alone is worth watching the show to me.  It is also why Simon Cowell is the man, and more people should be like him.  Of course if more people were like Simon, millions of kids across America would realize early on in life that maybe they should try to be good at something else.  But even the joy I have gotten the last few years out of the first few weeks has greatly faded to the point where I don’t really pay any attention to A.I.  That is until this season.  That is until Adam Lambert decided to show up and blow away everyone, including the normally unflappable Simon Cowell.

 

If you don’t watch A.I. regularly, I suggest that you at least find out when Adam is singing, and tune in just to watch him go at it.  Never in all of the years of A.I. have I seen a contestant as well rounded as Mr. Lambert.  He can go the flamboyant rout, and the very next week goes the straight laced 50’s school boy rout.  He can hit notes that only eunuchs and young choir boys.  He can do just about anything he wants to up on stage, and the judges, as well as America, will talk about it for the rest of the week.

 

Every time I watch Adam perform he reminded me of someone.  It wasn’t until last week when I was talking to one of my co-workers that I figured out who.  Adam is Freddie Mercury from Queen reincarnated.  It is as simple as that.  I mean, look at the similarities:

 

1.      Both have dark hair

2.      Both have the ability to be as flamboyant as Elton John, yet as badass as Dave Grohl.

3.      Both are loved by women, but loved even more by men.

4.      Both have enough confidence in their abilities they can sell it to whoever is watching.

 

 

I never thought that there would anyone like Freddie Mercury in the music world again.  But then along came this kid.  When he wins American Idol he has the ability to blow away any other artist to be produced by the show. This all begs the question:  Where has he been all the other seasons this show has been on?  Every year I think this when they find new contestants, but really, where was he the year we had to listen to that douche bag Taylor Hicks?  No offense to Taylor, but he wouldn’t even be allowed to carry Adam’s ruby encrusted knapsack for him.  Taylor would be lucky enough to push one of the brooms that sweep the stage at the end of the night after Adam kicked butt all over it earlier in the day.

 

So for at least one more season, I will watch A.I.  This one guy makes it totally worth it.  You go Adam.  Freddie Mercury would be so proud.